Or in my case poetry. I have a short little poem about a crush. I cannot write this on my actual FB page because my paranoid personality is sure said crush will somehow read my mind, know it’s about them, and then things would be weird.
I swear I’m not shy, and pretty forward when I’m interested in someone, but my confidence in myself has been totally blown lately. I’m sucking at this whole online dating thing. I mean sucking big honkin blue balls. It seems what I like looks wise doesn’t like me, and what likes me look wise I have no interest in. We could argue over looks not being everything, but I do try to evaluate everyone by just the basics. You know, would I be okay walking down the street with a dude that has a huge unibrow and teeth that looked like they were in an MMA fight all on their own? No.
I’m superficial. Sue me. So are you. You just don’t want to admit it. You don’t want a unibrow man with teeth that could give you a hysterectomy either.
Anyway… So, while the interwebs dating thing is at an almost standstill, I crush on random guys that I shouldn’t. You know, the kind that probably have a whole closet full of issues bursting at the seams, but looks make me say “Me gusta”.
So here, I give my scribbles to the random internets!:
I can’t have what I want…
Or yet, no confidence in even planning the chase for your lips, your heart
And so, clandestine affairs reverberate throughout my night-time musings
Not dreams, as I control the level of love and lust lucidness that permeates the atmosphere of my mind
Not true to real life, I think, though I’ve never been in such a situation with you
So I just imagine
Arms wrapped around and warmth seeping like a kiss against the goose-pimpled skin of my body
I’m giving myself away, or is it not obvious that I burn like a small sun in your presence?
I must keep the secret, so I’m not hurt by your disinterest.
So I let a rain of lies my mind has made up wash over me, so that you don’t shine so bright in my emotional senses.
And the pretense is that I’m just a no one, a figment on the wind.
Don’t trouble yourself,
And leave me to my imaginings.